August 2008

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My Monster

Sometimes I think that with me in my life I have absolutely no need for a ‘worst enemy’. If I did have a nemesis they’d be hard pressed to do a better job than I do. It seems that my perfectionist streak extends into the destructive areas too.

I know I’m not alone. I know that there are hundreds of thousands, perhaps even millions, of people who single handedly pick apart anything that’s remotely good in their lives.

I used to behave this way because I didn’t believe I deserved the good stuff, I didn’t think I was worth it. I now realize I am worth it, no thanks to those L’Oréal adverts. Yet I still find myself, every once in a while, desperate to destroy. It’s as if there’s some sadistic part of me that needs to feed every few years. Like those monsters that lie dormant and then, thanks to some event, awake to wreak havoc on the public.

What has recently woken my monster up?

It took me a while, I can be dense when it suits me, but I’ve worked it out. Two weeks from now I move in with The Boyfriend. This is the first time I’ll be living with someone I’m dating. It’s a big deal for me. I’d love my monster to work that this is something I want before she messes up everything.

I hope she doesn’t try eat The Boyfriend. I have no idea how I’d explain that to his parents.

What is it about people that make us so difficult to satisfy? It never seems to be enough. I, for one, am so tired of filling my life with meaningless stuff. I seem to be, like so many other people out there, gorging myself on things.

Am I trying to justify my existence? Do I believe that the more unnecessary objects I own the more I matter?

I think that I, and a whole lot of people, have a seriously warped sense of reality. I’m coming to realize that life isn’t about all the rubbish. It’s not about how big the job is, how much money I earn or how good looking I am or could be (with the right surgery). It’s not about the car I drive, the restaurants I’m seen in or the people I’m seen with. It’s about seeing the world as it really is, valuing yourself for who you are not what you have. Stress is not something to wear proudly. It’s not a badge of achievement. It’s a life-threatening symptom of the very skew lives we lead.

We all spend so much time chasing down the ‘more’ that I think we completely miss the point. We fail to see the gifts that life gives us everyday.

Love, joy, laughter and happiness have no place in the world of more.  Sincere smiles and magic moments are found in the places of less. I think it is time we reassess our priorities and start making some fundamental changes to our world.